When the Heart Stops Beating
by TallulahQ
Summary: Greg and Sam offer to help Team 2 with a hostage situation. Events go horribly wrong and Sam is left fighting for his life. This is part 1 of a two part story. This is my first fanfiction. I know this story is nowhere near as good as others I have read but I decided to post it anyway. I think part two is better but I let you guys be the judge.


**PART ONE**

** WHEN THE HEART STOPS BEATING**

**Chapter 1 - Best Job In the World.**

This was not how he thought his day would end. He looked up into the sky; flakes of snow were falling onto his face. The crushing pain he had felt in his chest had gone. He was almost peaceful. As the darkness began to engulf him, he knew instinctively he was dying.

Three hours earlier.

Sam was flicking his pen between his first and second finger making tapping noises on the table top while he stared at the papers before him. As hard as he tried, he couldn't concentrate on the tactical analysis reports; a certain someone kept invading his thoughts distracting him from the task at hand. She had been doing that a lot lately, tiptoeing into his brain when he least expected it. He smiled remembering how beautiful she had looked at 5 a.m. snuggled under his big duvet when he kissed her gently before leaving for the SRU. He could barely drag himself away, but unfortunately his new position as Team Leader came with new responsibilities. He loved his new role and although it was only temporary while Ed was recuperating after being shot by Colin Potter, he wanted to prove that he was capable of doing the job as well as Ed.

In any other circumstance, Sam would be telling anyone who would listen how incredibly happy he was. That he had found the one person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with; to marry and have children with. But this was the SRU and relationships were banned between members of the same team. Neither wanted to leave Team 1 so they played it safe and told no one. They had a contingency plan in the event they were found out but they hoped it would never happen.

Sam couldn't concentrate; she was there again, stopping him from finishing the damn reports.

"Morning Sam".

Sam was startled; he hadn't even heard Greg come into the briefing room.

"Morning Boss."

"What's this, Sam doing reports at 6 in the morning?"

Sam smiled _Sam is doing reports at 6 am because that is the only time he can do them - if Greg only knew how much he would have loved to stay cuddled up to Jules_.

Team 2 was just arriving back following another false alarm. Greg greeted John Sullivan Team 2's Sergeant. Greg liked John Sullivan immensely. He was an excellent Sergeant and negotiator.

John Sullivan was exasperated, another false alarm, the third that week. It wasn't that he craved the excitement of a real, full on emergency it was just false calls were time consuming and someone, somewhere may not have been helped because they were out chasing their tails.

Greg looked out of the window, the grey undulating clouds threatening more snow to fall on the already white blanket. The wind had picked up pace and was whipping the lying snow around creating peaks like icing on a cake. It's going to be a nasty one, Greg thought; let's hope no one needs them today.

"Hot call Team 2 Gear Up. Shots fired at Laker Street possible hostage situation."

Greg knew hostage situations could be difficult at the best of times and as he and Sam had three hours before their shift; Greg suggested to Sam that they should offer their assistance on the call. Sam jumped at the chance he couldn't concentrate on the reports anyways, and he needed to be out in the field so he could focus.

"You and Sam are offering to ride along on the call?" John Sullivan asked his friend Greg.

"Yes, we thought you could use the extra bodies".

John Sullivan knew Sam was the best sniper in the SRU and Greg the best negotiator so if you were given the chance to work with the best why in the hell would you refuse.

"Sure, let's go keep the peace".

Greg and Sam jumped into the black SUV behind John and his other team 2 colleague, Andrew Long. Andrew had only been on team 2 for six months and was still very much a rookie. He was training to be a long range marksman but was having a little trouble with the technical side of it. Sure it could hit the mark on the shooting range every time. Calculating the bullets trajectory over long distances, factoring in wind velocity, altitude and weather conditions was another matter. Sam had volunteered to give him some extra tutoring. It always surprised Sam that the majority of people did not realize the technical aspect that went with a 'point and shoot' guy and the intense training required.

"Winnie", John spoke through his headset, "any more information you can give us we're two minutes out?"

The SRU dispatcher replied instantly, "sorry still waiting for an update from the unis on the scene, will let you know any Intel as soon as I have it."

John hated going into a situation blind. Every SRU officer was trained to be prepared but occasionally they all had to work without Intel. Doing so, however, was unpredictable and dangerous.

John Sullivan spoke to his team reminding them a silent approach was required as standard practice for deployment to hostage situations. No one wanted to make the situation or the subject even more volatile with sirens blaring and lights flashing.

The convoy of 3 SUVs slowed as they arrived at the location.

"Still waiting on Intel Winnie" John said with a now impatient inflection in his voice.

"Some information coming from an officer on the scene" Winnie's voice spoke into the headsets. "Witness on the scene heard shots fired and a woman or women scream".

"OK thanks Winnie get the officer to bring the witness over to me."

"Copy that"

John got out of the SUV closely followed by Andrew, Greg and Sam. The other team members were disembarking from their SUVS. Sam looked over and saw Team 2s Team Leader walking towards where they were standing. Team 2's TL Brian Coulson had joined the SRU around the same time as Ed, but that was where the similarity ended. He was good at tactical, but Ed was better. Sam felt Brian Coulson was jealous of Ed. He also had a tendency to be self-righteous and condescending. Coulson especially had a problem with Sam, so they barely spoke unless it was work related. Jules disliked him the most and had once told Sam that she felt he was a chauvinistic idiot when he had made some comment to her that women shouldn't be allowed in the SRU.

"Can't stand that guy, he's an arrogant ass and he never looks at me when we talk, he just constantly stares at my breasts and it creeps me out" Jules said once when they had been lying in bed discussing the job.

"I can't blame him for staring Jules, I have enough trouble myself", he joked and Jules slapped his bare chest.

"What would you say if I looked at your crotch all day?"

"What do you mean... you don't?"

"Well not all the time Sam, I would never get any work done" Jules teased.

That warranted a tickle, followed by a very long mouthwateringly sweet kiss that led to…..

John Sullivan commenced recording the events for SRU logs:

"Team 2 arrived on scene at 06.39hrs and is joined by Team 1 Lead Negotiator, Gregory Parker and Team 1 Head of Tactical Sam Braddock. Both Team 1 members had agreed to assist Team 2 in today's operation. Current information to hand that this is a potential armed hostage situation, with shots fired. I will be speaking to a possible witness with Gregory Parker."

John stopped the recording when the officer brought the witness over to the team and introduced him as Clarence Dalton, 68 years of age, who had been walking home down Laker Street when the incident occurred.

Clarence Dalton told the SRU that he heard gunshots and then screams coming from an apartment block just in front where the SUVs had parked. He then pointed to where he thought the shots had come from.

"Up high, in that block there," Mr. Dalton said and pointed towards the top floor of a 3 story apartment block.

John Sullivan thanked Mr. Dalton and sent him with a uniformed officer for his statement to be taken.

Team 2 gathered round and awaited instructions. John addressed the team. Although they knew very little, what they did know was that shots had been fired and screams heard from the top floor the exact whereabouts still to be determined.

Just as John Sullivan had finished addressing the team shouts were heard coming from the apartment building. Everyone turned towards the shouts to see a man at a top floor window, his left arm around a woman's neck and in his right hand a gun pointing at her right temple.

"Fuck off, the man shouted, "or I swear to fucking god I will kill the bitch"

"He's a little irritable", Coulson joked, but no one laughed.

Instead John Sullivan took the megaphone and called up to the man at the window. "This is the Strategic Response Unit we are only here to help you. No one has to get hurt today."

"Wanna bet, pigs, the only person getting hurt is this bitch here, I'm going to put a hole in her head and throw her out of this goddam window, if you don't fuck off NOW."

The man then dragged the terrified woman back inside the apartment and away from the window.

"Ray, we need intel on the resident of that apartment, and plans please, as soon as possible" John Sullivan asked his technical expert Ray Benton.

"Copy Sarge, I'm on it "Ray Benton confirmed.

John then turned to Greg and asked him his take on the situation. Greg knew that the subject was already at Red and he could not see him de-escalating and suggested a sierra position should be set up.

"Plans being sent to your PDAs now Sarge and the occupant according to the lease is a Tracey Winters, 29. She is single and works as a receptionist for Hawkes, Brown and Cornwall, a legal firm in Brookfield Place." Ray Benton confirmed. And in anticipation of John Sullivan's next question Ray added "Still trying to locate family members, no luck yet, but I'll keep trying".

"OK thanks Ray, also contact the company," John Sullivan asked.

Information was needed as to why this particular woman was being held at gun-point by as yet an unnamed individual. Was it an ex-boyfriend, co-worker, or stalker? Whoever he was, Greg was right he was already at Red and no one believed he could be talked down.

Team 2's Head of Tactical, Brian Coulson suggested going stealth into the building up to the apartment, aggressive entry and subdue the subject.

"And the hostage would be dead before you got through the door" Sam said.

"What do you think Sam?" Greg asked, knowing Sam had proven himself over the past couple of months to be a solid and skilled tactical officer for Team 1.

Sam had carried out a brief reconnaissance of the building from the plans that had been sent to their PDAs. Sam suggested they go to the roof top, rappel down the back of the building and in through the rear window. He pointed to the plans on the PDA where he had established the point of entry.

"Subject will not be expecting entry here, but we'll need to keep his focus to the front of the building, which shouldn't be a problem with all the police around." Sam said.

John Sullivan and Greg Parker both agreed that Sam's plan would be the one they would go with.

"The Plan sounds solid, Sam, make it happen" John Sullivan told the Team 1 sniper.

Sam explained he would first need to gather Intel and said the building behind had a good vantage point to the rear of the apartment. This was what Sam was good at, what he had been trained to do, what he loved to do.

"OK Sam, take Andrew, make it happen" John ordered.

"Copy" the two young officers replied and set off to the building in question.

John turned to Greg. "Don't suppose Braddock would want a transfer to team 2". "Afraid not, and even if he did I wouldn't let him" Greg answered proud of his Tactical Officer.

Ray Benton's voice came through everyone's headsets. "Have some more information for you guys; Tracey Winters has two sisters, Sonya and Helen Winters both unmarried. There is no other living relative as far as I can gather. Mom and Dad were killed in a car accident in 2008. However, Sonya Winters has been linked to an upstanding fellow by the name of Jason DeShawn, His arrest record reads like a book; drug dealing, prostitution, gangs, you name it, he's involved in it".

"Thanks Ray, that could possibly tell us the who, we just need to know why" John replied.

"It could also mean that the person being held may not be Tracey Winters; it could be her sister Sonya: Do we have an address for Sonya Winters? Greg asked Ray.

"Yes, do you want me to get the unis to check it out?" Ray asked.

"That would be helpful" Greg said. He would not normally need to ask Spike and his frustration spilled out into his voice. But he needed to remember this was not his call, and this was not his team. Greg added a "thanks Ray" at the end and softened his tone a little.

Andrew and Sam made their way to the building opposite and climbed the concrete stairs to the roof. "How's the studying going, done those calculations I set for you yet?" Sam asked as they made their way on to the snow covered roof top.

Andrews face dropped a little "It's hard Sam but I think I'm finally getting my head around it."

Sam just smiled, "It's not easy, but once you get the hang of them, the calculations become second nature and you'll be doing them in your sleep."

Sam found a spot and took out the binoculars, the roof was level with the 3 story apartment opposite and with no curtains at the window it made for a clear view into what looked like the bedroom. The bedroom door was open and Sam could see the hallway leading to the lounge area at the front of the apartment. He could also make out a body lying on the floor in the bedroom: A woman, who appeared to be unconscious or dead.

'Boss', Sam called into his headset, and both Greg and John answered simultaneously "Yes Sam".

Andrew and Sam smiled. Andrew was looking into the room with binoculars while Sam spoke to Greg and John.

"There is a body of a woman on the floor, I'm guessing unconscious or worse."

"Can you make the entry?" John asked the Team 1 sniper.

"Absolutely," Sam said and then added "when we're in Brian and his team needs to be ready for aggressive entry via the front on my signal. We don't want to risk any harm coming to the hostage." Sam was already in Team Leader mode, he knew what had to be done to secure the safety of the hostage and subdue the subject: Ed had taught him well.

Sam and Andrew made their way back to the apartment block and entered via the back and climbed the fire escape stairs to the roof and began securing the ropes ready to rappel down the building.

Sam looked at his watch - still only 7.25, the guys will probably be in the middle of their workouts - they would be so jealous He loved this job, the adrenaline rush he got from tactical planning and rappelling down sides of buildings, best job in the world.

Sam loved his job, loved the SRU and his teammates. Once he put the uniform on Jules became a colleague and a team mate and not his lover and best friend. It was the same for her also. When they had agreed to rekindle their relationship Jules was absolutely adamant that there would be a thick black line marking their work life from their love life. Jules had made him swear on her life that he would uphold the priority of life code without question if her life was ever in danger and she had sworn to do the same. Their lives would be secondary to the innocent people caught up in whatever horrible situation had befallen them.

"Ready boss" he signaled and waited for the authorization.

"Copy Sam, you have a go".

Sam then turned to Andrew "Ready, let's go and save some lives." With that the officers leapt from the building.

* * *

**Chapter 2 - Devastating Day**

0700hrs - SRU Building.

"So where's the Boss?" Jules asked Winnie.

"The Boss and Sam were assisting Team 2 with a Hostage situation, call came in 6.15 this morning. Reports of shots fired in the vicinity of Laker Street."

"Where's the Boss, Jules?" Spike asked as he came out of the locker room.

"He and Sam are helping Team 2 with a hostage situation" Jules replied then added "Might as well get some training in while we wait for them to get back. Spike you look like you've gained a few pounds, it's all those dinner dates with Natalie". Jules teased as she patted Spike's belly.

"Are you serious, you think I've gained weight?" Spike said looking down to his belly and I was blaming my ma for shrinking the uniform in the dryer".

"I'm just teasing, Spike. Come on I'll even let you pick the film".

Jules started her work out on the running machine. Her mind wondered what her man, her gorgeous man, was doing right at that moment and she hoped he wasn't having too much fun without her.

Wordy was the next Team 1 member to arrive and asked what Jules and Spike had both asked. "Where's the boss?"

"On a call with Team 2" Jules and Spike said in unison.

The three SRU members were in good spirits as they commenced their training session. The team loved this part of the day. It was a good way to relax before the stress of the day took over.

"What are we watching?" Wordy asked.

"My choice, Jules said I could choose". Spike stated and pressed the button on the remote to play the selected film.

"I love this film" Spike said as he started to chant "Bad boys, bad boys what you gonna do, what you gonna do when they come for you…Tia Leoni is hot - don't you think Natalie looks like her?"

"Well, kind of Spike" Wordy teased "They are both blonde".

Sam and Andrew hung in mid air while Sam carefully opened the bedroom window. With the window opened, both officers slipped inside the room without a sound being made.

Sam didn't need to check the woman's vital signs; she was clearly dead; half her face was missing and brain matter and spilled out onto the beige carpet. He turned to see Andrew visibly trying to suppress the urge to vomit.

"Boss" Sam whispered into his headset "The woman in the bedroom is deceased."

"OK Sam, do we know how she died?" Greg asked.

"Believe it to be a bullet or bullets to the head": Sam thought the woman had been shot at least twice in the head judging by the extent of the damage. Whoever the man was who was holding the woman in the lounge hostage, he clearly meant business. She was lucky she was still alive. "Boss I think this guy is way passed negotiation, it looks like an execution".

Greg knew that made the situation ever more dangerous for the two officers.

"Stay safe, both of you and watch your backs." Greg told Sam.

Inside the bedroom Sam could see the subject waving a 9mm semi-automatic around, shouting at the woman who was now sitting on the floor in front of him crying.

"Where is it, you dumb bitch? What have you stupid bitches done with the gear?" The man screamed into the terrified woman's face.

"I don't know what you're talking about I swear I don't know" The woman replied through terrified tears.

She was facing the hallway leading to the bedroom and the subject had his back to Sam and Andrew.

Sam knew if they didn't act quickly the woman would be dead. Sam asked Coulson if he was ready for aggressive entry to the front and Coulson confirmed that he was in position.

"Ring the doorbell" Sam told Coulson

"What, why? I thought we were going in aggressive?" Coulson asked questioning Sam's logic.

"He isn't going to be expecting the doorbell to ring and it should distract him just long enough for us to signal the hostage to stay down and ensure her safety. Then when I say Go, you go in aggressively" Sam explained.

Coulson knew Sam's plan was solid "Copy" and then the doorbell rang.

Sam could see the subject was distracted, and was making his way over to the door. Sam signaled the hostage to stay where she was and to remain on the floor and then gave Coulson the command to go just as the subject looked through the peep hole.

The door was broken open and four SRU Officers entered the room, weapons raised and shouting commands to the subject to put his weapon down.

Andrew was able to approach the hostage to ensure she was OK while Sam went behind the subject and forced him down and disarmed him in two quick movements. Special Forces gave you the best training for a take down. It was over in seconds. Best job in the world Sam thought and he tightened the cuffs around the subject's wrists.

"Subject secured, hostage safe" Sam announced into his headset as he and Andrew brought down the subject and the hostage.

"Good job" John said to the two officers.

"Excellent job, Sam" Greg said and patted him on the shoulder.

The hostage had been taken to St. Simons and the subject was arrested and taken away by uniformed officers. Greg had spoken to the hostage and discovered she was in fact Tracey Winters and the dead woman was her sister Sonya. She had not been forthcoming as to why she had been held hostage or why her sister had been murdered, but he would hazard a guess it had something to do with Jason DeShawn. Greg concluded, however, that she was in no fit state to answer any of his questions; he would leave that particular job to the homicide detectives.

It was coming up to 8.30, Team 2 had earned some overtime, especially with all the paperwork. Greg and Sam were to head back to start their shift.

The advantage of a ride along - all the fun none of the boring paperwork Sam thought.

"I think you can forego your workout Sam you've done enough exercise for one day. How about a nice quiet day patrolling". Greg said smiling at his young tactical officer. He had done well today and he was proud.

"Copy that" Sam replied.

Team 2 was gearing up ready to leave the scene when people were noticed on the roof of the same apartment building. Everyone turned their eyes upward to see some kind of disturbance taking place.

"What do you think is going on Boss, two situations in one building, what are the odds?" Sam stated

"John, what do you think, you want to send someone up to check it out? There's also a lot of snow on the roof, it could be dangerous." Greg stated.

John agreed with Greg and ordered Brian Coulson and Sam to go and check out the situation.

Both men raced back to the same building Sam had only half hour before taken the subject from.

Sam and Brian made their way up to the roof where they found three individuals, two men and one woman, arguing. The woman was clearly distressed.

The two officers, MP5's raised and ready, approached the individuals.

"SRU please stop what you are doing" Sam ordered the individuals.

"Can you explain what you are doing up here on the roof today" Coulson asked.

One of the men said his name was Steven Daniels and he was trying to find something Sonya had stolen from her boyfriend, Jason DeShawn and give it back to him. DeShawn had sent one of his men to get it and when Sonya wouldn't tell him where it was, he shot her in the head and took Tracey hostage. Helen, the woman with him on the roof was Sonya and Tracey's sister and he and his brother was trying to help her.

"You are talking about drugs?" Sam asked bluntly. He had no time for games. "What and how much?"

"A kilo of cocaine" The man named Steven said

"That's about $25,000 to $30,000 street value" Sam said and then looked at Coulson. He wished he was with one of his Team 1 colleagues; they had a certain rapport and instinctively knew what the other was thinking. He did not think Coulson was as uneasy about the whole situation as he; but maybe it was him - maybe he was reading too much into it.

"Boss" Sam said into his headset and started to walk away from the three individuals leaving Coulson covering them. "We need officers up on the roof to do a drug search. Apparently the sister of the hostage had hidden a kilo of cocaine somewhere up here before she was murdered. And Boss" Sam added in a quieter tone "there is something not right about this whole situation; I am not buying this guy's story". Sam was getting the cuffs ready, he was going to arrest all of them and sort it out later.

Sam did not hear the response from his Sergeant.

"What the hell…?" Were the last words Greg heard Sam say through the com link.

Greg then heard the sound every officer feared the most - gun shots coming from the roof.

John Sullivan raced to where Greg was standing. Everyone had heard the shots and everyone prayed the shots had come from the SRU officers.

Greg frantically tried to raise Sam on his com link. John was doing the same with Coulson. There was silence.

Then moments later Greg and John look on in horror as Sam and a young woman fell from the rooftop onto the snow covered concrete floor some 50 feet below.

The thud as the two bodies hit the floor made Greg nearly throw up the entire contents of his breakfast. Even landing onto thick snow did not stifle the sound. It reverberated in Greg's brain; it was the sound he knew would stay with him forever.

Officers raced over to where the two bodies lay, but had to hastily retreat as the two men on the roof began shooting at the police below.

"We can't get to them Greg the shields are in the truck and as soon as officers move towards it the bastards open fire. We pinned down here. We need back up." John Sullivan was already cursing the day.

Greg tried to compose himself. He called Winnie and told her to get EMS to the Laker Street location as one, possible two SRU Officers and a female had been injured. He also told Winnie to get his team there a.s.a.p. Greg could not hide the panic in his voice. Winnie instinctively knew Sam was one of the officers injured.

Hot Call Team 1 Gear Up.

Jules and Spike raced over to Winnie, as the despatcher was ordering EMS to the location of Laker Street.

"What's going on Winnie?" Jules asked, her heart starting to race as she knew something dreadful had just happened.

"We have an officer or officers down at Team 2's location".

"Who's down", Spike asked "Who's the officer Winnie?" Spike almost pleading with the despatcher.

"I think its Sam" Winnie said.

The color drained from Jules' face as she raced to the locker room to gear up. All three Team 1 members were geared up and ready in 3 minutes and headed for the SUV.

Spike let Wordy drive, Wordy had excellent driving skills but more importantly he was a lot calmer than either him or Jules.

"Boss, we're on route, we'll be with you in"… Jules turned to Wordy for their ETA. "Five" Wordy confirmed by showing five fingers to Jules while he continued to concentrate on driving at high speed through morning rush hour traffic. "2 minutes" Jules told Greg. Wordy looked at Jules with a 'what the fuck' look but didn't argue; his foot just pressed the accelerator even harder.

Greg knew he had to tell his team what had happened before they arrived; they needed to be forewarned because the sight that was going to greet them was not going to be pleasant.

Team 1 arrived on scene with chaos all around. Shots were being fired from the roof top to the police below. Jules turned to see Sam's body still lying on the snow along with the woman. It took every piece of self-control she had not to run straight over to him. She turned to the Sarge, her eyes tearing into Greg.

Greg explained they had been unable to get to them so far because of the shooters on the roof. He told Jules and Andrew Long that they needed to set up sierra positions on the roof of the building opposite.

"You will need to take a shield but be careful Jules stay behind the shield and keep low. Let me know the situation when you're up there" Greg told his protégé as she and Andrew made their way to the building carrying their sniper rifles.

"Boss" Spike ran to where Greg was standing "We've got the shields, me and Wordy are going to check on Sam and the female.

"It's too risky Spike, you need other officers to provide cover - and they're pinned down" Greg told his technical expert.

"Boss, its Sam, we can't leave him there" Spike pleaded.

Greg looked at both Spike and Wordy and knew nothing he could say would deter the team 1 members from checking on their colleague even at the risk of their own lives.

"Go, but please be careful and stay safe".

"Copy Boss".

Jules had never worked with Andrew before but Sam had told her he was a talented marksman and Team 2 was lucky to have him. She turned to Andrew "Do you think you can handle the shot? You need to be sure; there are no second chances, Andrew you cannot miss?"

"I know you haven't worked with me before Jules, but Sam has and he's a good teacher. I can make the shot" He then looked through the scope of his rifle and told Jules he had eyes on the two men on the roof firing at the officers and could also see Coulson, he was lying face down towards the West side of the building.

"Let me know when you've got a shot, Andrew." Jules said as she set up her sniper rifle and looked through the sight. Both shooters were on the east side of the building.

"Your target is wearing a blue jumper and hat, Copy?"

"Copy" Andrew said "I have the target in my sight"

"Boss, I have the solution" Jules confirmed to her Team 1 Sergeant.

"Sarge, I have the solution" Andrew said to John Sullivan.

"Scorpio" Greg told Jules

"Scorpio" John told Andrew.

On the snow covered rooftop of the building opposite two bodies fell.

"Subjects down, the situation has been contained. EMS needed immediately I can see Brian Coulson he appears to be unconscious." Jules said.

Jules started to run. She slid down most of the concrete stairs her rifle still in her hand. She had to see Sam; she had to know if he was alive or dead. As Jules emerged on the street she could see the ambulance disappearing from view. Sam had been taken to hospital and now she wondered if she would ever see him alive again. The lump in her throat became a sob as she turned to Greg. "How was he Boss?"

Greg didn't answer, he didn't need to she could see it written on his face. It was bad, it was worse than her, worse than Ed - it couldn't be worse like Lou could it? Jules fell to her knees the sobbing more intense. "I have to go to the hospital Sarge, please; I need to be with him".

Greg bent down and placed his arms around her and helped her to stand taking the rifle from her and handed it to the waiting SIU Officer. "I'm sorry Jules, SIU are already here and waiting to take you and Andrew. I doubt if we would be allowed to see him for a good few hours and by that time you will be there".

"I love him" Jules blurted out.

"I know you do Jules"

Jules was shocked. She and Sam had been so careful knowing the consequences their 'on again' relationship would have on the team.

"How?" Was all Jules could say.

"Because Jules, you hadn't stopped smiling and Sam, well I had never seen him happier. We can talk about this later; we have more important things to concern us now."

The SIU Officer took Jules by her arm and walked her towards the waiting black sedan.

Greg rubbed his bald head trying to erase the events of the day. He couldn't bring himself to think of Sam dying - did not want to contemplate it. But deep down he knew from the look on the paramedic's face that Sam dying was a distinct possibility. Greg also knew that Jules would never forgive him if Sam died while she was with SIU. He wondered what had happened on the roof top and why his officer and the female had fallen. Were they pushed? He knew Sam was suspicious of the man calling himself Steven Daniels but how did the situation escalate so quickly? There were a lot of unanswered questions about this case and the two people who could possibly answer some of them were seriously injured and unconscious.

Greg had called Ed and had told him what had happened and asked if he could head over to the hospital so Sam wouldn't be alone. He shuddered when he thought of Sam falling off the building. Although there was a thick layer of snow covering the pavement, there was not nearly enough to prevent serious damage being done to a body. And if, by some miracle, Sam survived, his days with the SRU were surely over.

Greg's thoughts were interrupted by Spike and Wordy who informed him that the Brian Coulson was alive and had also been taken to St. Simons. They also informed Greg that the bodies had been removed and the forensic team was on the roof gathering evidence but as yet had not found any drugs. The body of the young woman, who had fallen with Sam, had been taken to the mortuary.

Thoughts then turned to Sam and all three knew where they had to be. The SRU officers climbed into the SUV and drove the five mile journey to the hospital in complete silence. No one dared speak about the possibility that Sam might already be dead.

_He had no pulse, _Spike thoughts were running around his brain like an out of control truck._ Or was it that he just couldn't find it. Wordy tried and he couldn't feel a pulse. EMS tried and said he had a pulse, barely. He was not going to lose another friend to this job. Sam, more like a brother especially since he had been dating Sam's sister, Natalie. Shit Natalie. She doesn't know._

The knot is Spike's stomach became excruciatingly tight when the SUV turned into the parking lot of St. Simons.

Wordy parked as close to the entrance as possible but held his hands tightly on the steering wheel not letting go.

"You coming in Wordy? Greg asked.

"Don't know if I can, Boss, I'm not sure how much more this team can take. We lost Lou, nearly lost Jules and Ed, now Sam. I need to go Boss, I need to go and see Shelly and the kids. I'll come back later; I just can't face this right now."

"OK buddy, you go see Shelly, we'll be here when you get back." Greg said.

The two men walked through the large glass double doors and made their way to the emergency room. They found Ed sitting on a black plastic chair, his head in this hands and he was crying.

* * *

**Chapter 3 - The Ultimate Fight**

Jules sat at the desk tapping her nails on the table top. Her right leg crossed over her left and her foot dancing around to a silent rhythm.

To anyone who did not know Julianna Callaghan they would think she was nervous; maybe she had something to hide, but that was because they did not know Juliana Callaghan. Julianna Callaghan was angry. Angry at the bastards on the roof who cold-bloodedly shot Sam, Brian and the young female. Angry at the stupid rules which meant she had to be here instead of the hospital and angry at Greg and Sam for going out on a call with Team 2, why? Why the fuck would they do that?

Jules was also angry with the SIU detective who sat across from her: He looked like he was still in high school. His hair was cut short. His hands were small and his fingers short and stubby. He was writing something which Jules was trying to read, but couldn't quite make out the words upside down. Jules disliked him intensely for no other reason than keeping her there when all she wanted was to be with Sam. She stared at the SIU Officer's cell phone which he had placed on the table. It was turned on. SIU Officers sometimes left their cell phones on during interrogation if they were waiting for updates from an ongoing situation or if they were waiting to hear the status of injured victims or officers. She was glad the phone on the table had not rung. She knew if his phone rang it would mean Sam was dead.

Jules prayed his phone stayed silent. She would not be able to cope if Sam died. Even thinking Sam might die made her heart race. She was panicking; Jules never panicked but today she was panicking. What if Sam was dead, what would she do? How could she cope? Her breathing becoming more rapid and she had to bite the inside of her mouth to try and stay calm and focused.

"Officer Callaghan, "Officer Callaghan" the SIU Detective said trying to get her attention.

Jules looked at the SIU detective with contempt. She hated being made to stay and answer stupid irrelevant questions.

"Do you believe Sergeant John Sullivan and Sergeant Gregory Parker had exhausted all negotiation procedures before ordering Scorpio on the two subjects?"

Jules rolled her eyes, not believing the question she had just been asked. It was useless, however, not to answer them as it would only delay her getting to the hospital. "There was no negotiation, the subjects were not even suspects; they just opened fire on the woman, Officer Braddock and Officer Coulson and then started firing on the police below".

"How quickly did you respond to Sergeant Gregory Parker's Scorpio order" the SIU Detective asked.

"Immediately" Jules responded.

"Could you be more specific - how many seconds?"

"What? "I didn't have my stop watch with me," Jules replied sarcastically but continued "my reaction time would be logged in the report as it always is, but in practice my time is consistently 0.743 seconds or under. Are you seriously worried about how quickly I shot the subject? He was firing on police officers, it was a good shoot. The two subjects had shot two police officers on the roof. This whole interview is ludicrous and you know it. You are just wasting my time so instead of asking me inane questions how about you let me go and find out how my colleagues are doing". Jules demanded

The cell phone on the desk started to dance around. The buzzing sound made Jules physically jump. It was a text message. It was not a call. The SIU officer took the phone in his hand and read the message. His face remained expressionless.

The detective decided the interview was over. It wasn't that he thought she was about to leap across the table and rip his head off, if he did not let her leave. It was the complete look of desperation and sadness in her eyes. He had just received information that one of the officers was unlikely to survive and it would be cruel to keep her there when he knew, she knew and every officer in the SRU and SIU knew it was a good shoot.

"OK Officer Callaghan, I think I have enough information, you are free to leave. The SIU would be making a report and advising your Inspector of our findings, but I do not believe you have anything to worry about."

The last part of that sentence Jules did not hear as she was already out of the door and down the hallway.

_Please be alive Sam, please. I promise if you live Sam I will help you through this I will not abandon you again not for this job, not for anyone._

Jules pulled up to the parking lot of the hospital her hands shaking. She knew Sam must have felt this way when she had been shot. She remembered how amazing he had been. Sitting by her bed every night and walking her around and around the corridors of the hospital. He did everything possible to get her fit to rejoin the SRU and she repaid him by ending their relationship and breaking his heart. She wondered how she could ever have done that to him. How had she become so cold and calculating? But Jules was used to getting what she wanted even at the expense of the man she loved. She had been lucky - she had got him back. He had forgiven her and the Boss was right, she had not stopped smiling since.

She climbed out of the car and made her way to the emergency room.

Two Hours Earlier:

The Paramedics were running the gurney carrying the young unconscious officer through the doors leading to the emergency room to a team of waiting medical staff. The hospital had been forewarned of the imminent arrival of a seriously injured police officer.

One of the paramedics spoke to the lead Doctor telling him that Officer Braddock was a member of the SRU and had fallen from a roof of a three story building and had a gunshot wound to his right shoulder and two bullets lodged in this vest and had been unconscious at the scene.

The lead Doctor acknowledged the report and the team set about the task of saving the life of Sam Braddock.

An MRI, X-rays, and scans were ordered. A nurse started to cut off Sam's uniform, discarding its shredded remains into an evidence bag.

The gunshot wound to Sam's right shoulder, although serious, was not life threatening and would have to wait. So too was the obvious break to his right arm. What couldn't wait was the bleeding from the internal injuries he had sustained in the fall.

X-rays were ordered of Sam's head, chest, pelvis and spine. He had broken ribs which could have done some damage internally, but the doctors knew there would be a whole lot more going on; it had after all been a hell of a long way to fall.

The reports from the x-rays were encouraging - only a fracture to his right arm and broken ribs. The Scan and the MRI told a different story. Unbelievably Sam had escaped any serious injuries to his head but had suffered multiple internal injuries and bleeding. He needed surgery and he needed it immediately.

Alarms started going off and Sam's heart stopped.

"Code Blue," The nurse yelled "Get the crash cart".

Many hands were working on Sam. A nurse began cardiac compressions.

"We need to intubate" The Doctor quickly and expertly slid the tube down Sam's throat. "I'm in" he said as he hooked the tube to the machine that would breathe for Sam. Paddles were placed on Sam's chest. "Charge to 200" The Doctor instructed "Clear". The volts went through Sam's chest and his body visibly jerked.

No response.

"Again". The Doctor instructed.

Still nothing.

"Charge to 360" the Doctor instructed… "Clear". The volts went through the lifeless body and it jerked again.

A small blip came on the monitor followed by another, then another. Sam was back, for now.

The doctor asked if there were any family members present and was told that a member of the SRU had been waiting quite some time but Officer Braddock's family had yet to be notified. The Doctor found Ed sitting on the black plastic chair and recognized him instantly - he had been one of the doctors on call when Ed had come into the ER with seven bullets to his chest and arm. That time was different - Ed was always going to survive; the majority of the bullets lodged in his vest. Officer Braddock may not be quite so lucky.

The doctor spoke with a calmness that belied the situation. He warned Ed of the seriousness of Sam's condition and advised him to contact Sam's family as a matter of urgency as he might not last the next hour let alone the next day. He told Ed that Sam had suffered a cardiac arrest but they had managed to get him back and although he was young and strong the odds of surviving his injuries were stacked against him.

Ed could barely look at the doctor; the information had overwhelmed him. Ed leant back in the chair and put his face in his hands "Can I see him Doc?"

The Doctor looked at Ed and considered his request. The Doctor knew they could lose the young police officer at any time and going against hospital protocol told Ed he could see Sam just briefly.

Ed walked into the room. It was unbelievably bright with the smell of antiseptic and something else he couldn't make out. It reminded him of the room he had been in just a couple of months before. Then Ed saw Sam, attached to machines and monitors with a team of people still scurrying around. Ed could not believe how bad things actually were for Sam.

A nurse came up to Ed and he was sure he recognized her from before. "Officer Lane, I'm afraid you cannot touch Sam, but speak to him he might be able to hear you".

Ed liked the nurse, he like the way she had called him Sam and not Officer or Mr. Braddock.

"Hi Sam, how ya doing buddy. The rest of the guys are on their way and I'm going to call Natalie and your mom and dad". The lump in Ed's throat was beginning to impede his speech "Sam this is probably going to be the biggest fight of your life and it's going to be tough, but we are all going to be with you. We are going to fight with you Sam, every step of the way. You are young and strong and you are going to get through this, do you hear me Sam. You have to fight Sam".

One of the machines started to bleep erratically and then an alarm sounded.

"Code Blue, the patient's in cardiac arrest get Dr. Davis in here".

Ed was ushered out of the room as more medical staff rushed in. Ed sat back down on the chair.

Oh my god, Ed thought, Sam isn't going to win this battle, and then the tears came.

Greg and Spike walked up to Ed who was sitting in a chair his head in his hands.

"Ed is everything OK" Spike asked. Spike immediately knew the ridiculousness of the question he had just asked. Of course everything was not OK Sam had been shot and had fallen from a roof. Spike just didn't want to ask if Sam was dead.

"Are you OK buddy?" Greg asked Ed

Ed looked and Greg and Spike. It was his responsibility to tell them how bad things really were for Sam. He had to tell his friends that Sam had a cardiac arrest and the doctors had managed to get him back but he had suffered a second one and now he did not even know if Sam had survived because he had been sitting in a black plastic chair for over thirty minutes and no one had come out of the room yet.

Spike asked if Natalie had been contacted. Ed said he had tried to call her earlier but her phone had been off. Spike said he would call her and they agreed it would be better coming from him.

Spike turned to walk back out of the room and started to dial Natalie's number. She's going to think he's calling about meeting up for a drink or a meal. He's going to make her cry and make her beautiful smile disappear, possibly forever.

When Spike walked back to Greg and Ed, the doctor was with them.

The doctors had managed to stabilize Sam and therefore had to take him to surgery immediately -his condition was still critical and if they waited any longer Sam would die. The doctor warned they could be in for a very long wait.

The doctor then said the surgeon would come and speak to them when the surgery was over. As the doctor left he turned to the officers "the surgeon who will be operating on Officer Braddock is the best in his field, if anyone can save your colleague, it is him".

All three SRU Offices looked on as the medical team wheeled Sam out of the room and down the corridor.

_Sam could see Jules; she was just standing there looking at him. The snow was so thick and every time he got nearer to her, she got further away. 'Wait for me Jules. I can't keep up, just stop and wait.' He tried running but his legs were heavy and the snow too thick. 'Why won't you wait for me Jules I love you …you said you loved me too.' And then she was gone and Sam was alone._

_Sam laid down, the snow gone and the green grass was so comfortable. The sun was hot and it was making him tired, he just wanted to sleep._

_He heard Ed's voice, it was faint and he couldn't see him._

'_Where are you Ed, I can't see you.'_

'_You are young and strong and you are going to get through this do you hear me Sam. You have to fight Sam'_

'_I'm so tired Ed, if you see Jules, tell her I love her'_

Jules was walking through the doors when she heard her name being called; she turned to see Natalie running to catch her up.

"What happened to Sam, Jules? Spike called me and told me it was serious. Do you know anything?

"I don't know how he is Natalie; I've just arrived I have been with SIU" Jules replied trying to avoid telling Natalie that Sam, her beloved Sam, had fallen from a 3 story building after he had been shot.

"Have you let your mom and dad know Natalie?" Jules asked.

"I called mom, dad is away and is not contactable. Mom asked me to let her know how he is".

"Your mom's not coming?" Jules asked incredulously.

The two women found Greg, Ed and Spike sitting in a family waiting area drinking coffee from thin plastic cups.

"Spike" Natalie said, embracing him as the tears began to flow "How is he, does anyone know anything?"

"Nothing yet he's still in surgery" Spike replied his face unable to hide his concern for his friend. Natalie began to panic, "I need to call mom; she needs to be here".

Greg turned to Jules "Come on Jules, I'll buy you a coffee" Greg threw an empty plastic cup into the trash as they walked down the corridor.

Jules knew the coffee was a ploy and the Boss wanted to speak to Jules alone, which he did as soon as they were out of earshot of the others.

"How did SIU go Jules?"

"Fine" Jules replied "Why did you want to speak to me alone?"

"It's not looking good for Sam, Jules, you might need to prepare yourself to the possibility…"Greg said kindly but unable to finish the sentence. Here he was telling Jules to prepare herself when he could barely comprehend it himself.

"Boss, none of this should have happened; he wasn't even supposed to be working. Why would you go out on a call with Team 2? Don't we do enough, give enough to this job? Now Sam could die because you wanted to play the bloody hero. This is your fault - all of this is your fault". Jules knew her comment wounded Greg; she could see the hurt in his eyes. She had never thought it would be possible to ever hate Greg, she loved him more than her own father, but right here and right now she blamed him for putting Sam's life in jeopardy.

"I've decided to quit the SRU and before you get all fatherly on me, I am not changing my mind. You will have my resignation letter by the end of the week regardless of what happens to Sam".

Greg knew Jules was making a rash decision because she was in a state of sheer panic over Sam. He also knew she had said it to hurt him. He hoped her anger at him would subside eventually. He knew, however, that the guilt he felt would not disappear and if Sam died, he did not think he would be able to carry on in the SRU.

"Do you know Boss when I was shot Sam visited me every day? He helped me walk around every inch of this hospital. He held me when I cried and carried me when I had been too tired to walk. And I repaid him by ending our relationship because I wanted to be back on the team. I had wanted it so badly I was willing to give him up. For what, to be on a team that gets blown up and shot at? I wasted so much time not being with him and now he might die and he will never know how much I regret choosing the team over him. So now, I choose Sam over everything - over you and over the team. I know Sam loves me unconditionally and for the first time in my life I finally understand what I had been too stubborn, too damn scared to see for so long, I love him in exactly the same way".

Jules could not stop the tears nor did she want to. Her heart ached so much she could hardly breathe. Jules felt lost and for the first time since joining Team 1 utterly alone. Greg took Jules in his arms and even though she tried to push him away, he held her tightly until her body relaxed as she sobbed into his shoulder.

No words were needed: No words of comfort, no words of wisdom; no words at all.

Jules and Greg sat for a long time; Greg held Jules like a father would cuddle his little girl.

"I'm sorry Boss". Jules said breaking the silence.

"Don't be, Jules, you have nothing to be sorry for, this is my fault; my responsibility

"No, Boss, Sam is a big boy, you didn't make him go." Jules paused before she continued; she wanted to let Greg know she was serious. "I am still resigning from the SRU Boss. If Sam dies, then staying on the team would be impossible; it would be too hard there would be too many memories. If he survives, then he is going to need my full support to get well. I need to do this for the both of us, please understand."

Greg said he understood, but in his heart he hoped Jules would change her mind if he gave her time.

When Greg and Jules returned to the waiting area Wordy was there and as soon as he saw Greg headed over to him. He told Greg he was sorry he couldn't face the hospital earlier but Shelly had made him realize that Sam was family and he had to be there for him for good or bad.

Greg gave Wordy a gentle slap on the shoulder which signified there were no hard feelings.

John Sullivan arrived. He had been to see Brian Coulson.

"How's Brian?" Greg asked.

"He's Ok; he was shot in the shoulder. The Doctors think he will be well enough to leave hospital in a day or two. How's Sam? I feel responsible Greg, he went on the roof because of my orders" John said.

"You can't blame yourself John; Sam is an SRU Officer and he knows the risks, but it's not looking good for Sam; he's in surgery and they have warned us it could be a while. Can Brian remember what happened on the roof and how come Sam and the woman fell?" Greg asked.

"He cannot remember Sam getting shot, or how he came to fall off the roof with the woman. He thinks he was shot first and that's why he can't recall anything." John replied.

John left sometime later, asking Greg to let him know how Sam was.

The Doctor had not been wrong, the wait had been interminable. After six hours and still no news the team was beginning to get restless. The chairs had been OK for the first hour but as the hours went on the black plastic seats had become objects of sheer torture.

Wordy got up and offered to get some food and drink for everyone. Spike volunteered to go with Wordy and Natalie said she needed to stretch her legs so she went too.

Ed walked over and sat next to Jules. He told her the Boss had spoken to him about her intention to quit the SRU. "We all go through that. Look at me I was ready to quit when I was shot and Sophie had the baby. It's a normal reaction to a terrible situation. I'm just saying wait a couple of weeks and if you still want to quit I will support you."

All Jules wanted was for that day never to have happened. She wanted yesterday back when she and Sam had been so happy. She wondered if the Boss had told Ed that she and Sam were back together; had been since Toth. She wanted to tell Ed, but was uncertain to break her secret; maybe the Boss hadn't said anything.

Ed turned to Jules and she immediately knew Greg had told him.

"You know Ed, don't you, about me and Sam?"

"Greg told me you and Sam had been back together since Requalification. If that's true, Jules, no one knew. I didn't know because you both acted professionally every time you were out in the field. Listen, if you two want to be together and you don't let it interfere with the team and clearly you have shown you both can do that; then it's no one's business. If Sam makes it he is going to need all of us to get him back on the team".

"Do you really think Sam could get back on the team after what had happened to him?" Jules asked

"Why ever not, if we all help him. Jules he's young and strong and Christ, if he survives this he could do anything. He is going to have a fight on his hands Jules, there's no doubt, but we can't let him lose, because if he loses we all lose."

And there they all waited six hours turned into seven with still no news. The team had stopped jumping up every time the doors opened. Finally, after nearly eight hours and numerous cups of coffee, the doors opened and a man clearly dressed as a surgeon walk through.

He looked tired and concerned. He sat down and addressed Natalie as she was Sam's next of kin. He told her that Sam had survived the surgery, which led to unison of exhales from the team. He told her too that Sam was still critical and he had nearly bled out on the table. He told her that he had removed the bullet from his right shoulder and he wished he could tell her that was his only injury. Sam had, however, a catalogue of internal injuries, his liver was torn, his kidney damaged, his bowel had been ruptured and he no longer had a spleen. His lungs too had been punctured by the broken ribs in his chest. The surgeon continued to tell them all how very bad it was, but he was holding on: Sam was alive for now.

The team relaxed for the first time in what seemed like an eternity.

They were told they could see Sam through a glass screen in ICU which was up on the 3rd floor once he had been moved there from recovery. No one would be allowed into the room for the time being because of the risk of infection. They headed up to see him as soon as they were allowed. When they reached Sam's room everyone stopped. Ed had seen Sam earlier so he had been more prepared than the others to the site that greeted them. Jules gasped covering her mouth with her hand, and Natalie leaned into Spike. Wordy too was visibly shaken. Sam was attached to so many machines and monitors. A machine was breathing for Sam and as it pumped so Sam's chest rose and fell. The only injuries the team could see was the plaster cast on his right arm and a bandage covering the gunshot wound. All the other injuries were on the inside of Sam's body. Sam looked paler than Jules had ever seen him. His skin looked plastic. She was desperate to touch him to reassure herself that he was still alive, that his heart was still beating. She wanted to tell him she loved him that Greg and Ed knew and she really did not care about anything except him.

It took utter exhaustion to remove the SRU Officers from the ICU. One by one they drifted off to go home to eat to shower to sleep and to pray.

Greg left last leaving Jules and Natalie at the hospital with strict instructions for them to call if they needed him. He walked out of the hospital; it was dark outside and the snow was still falling, but far heavier now. He did not bother going to the SRU HQ to pick up his car. Greg ordered a cab and stood waiting by the entrance for it to arrive. He arrived at his apartment forty minutes later. It was warm in his apartment, Greg was thankful he had forgotten to turn down the thermostat when he had left for work almost 22 hours earlier. He wandered around his apartment, far too much caffeine and far too much stress, but there was something else - a niggling something at the back of his brain. Something was not right about this whole situation and it wasn't just the fact that Sam had fallen off the roof. The whole thing was just too damn hinky. He sat in his chair in the kitchen staring at the plate of food he had heated up in the microwave but now couldn't eat. He tried going over the events of the day in his mind as they had played out trying to figure out what was missing; what was the niggling something at the back of his brain. He couldn't think anymore, exhaustion was taking over and he needed sleep. He needed to recharge and maybe tomorrow it would come to him whatever it was that was playing on his mind.

Natalie and Jules stayed at the hospital taking it in turns to try and sleep on the uncomfortable black plastic chairs. But when sleep was not forthcoming, they spent the time talking trying to keep from thinking the unthinkable.

Natalie was telling Jules about her and Sam growing up in the Braddock household. Sam had told Jules some things but she knew there was a lot he had not told her. Jules had wondered why Sam and Natalie's father seemed such a tyrant and so unlike Sam in every single way and asked Natalie if he had always been that way.

"You mean an uncaring prick?" Natalie replied. "Yes, as far as I can remember he had always been a bully and he had a nasty temper. He hated Sam, never gave him an inch, and was always on his back. He used to beat Sam all the time when we were younger till one day my dad was picking on me about something or another and Sam stepped in. He must have been 15 or 16. My dad went berserk but Sam floored him and he never laid a hand on me or Sam again."

It was morning some 24 hours since Sam had fallen off the roof and he was still alive he had made it through the night.

Natalie had managed to fall asleep on one of the plastic chairs using her folded up jumper as a pillow. Jules was still awake terrified she would miss Sam waking up if she closed her eyes for one second.

She did not want to wake Natalie but she was desperate for a pee and did not want Sam to wake up and no one be there. Jules, her bladder now fit to burst, decided it would be better to wake Natalie rather than have a puddle on the floor.

"Natalie, Nat, wake up" Jules said poking her sort of sister in law in the arm.

Natalie woke with a start "I need to use the bathroom, can you keep an eye on Sam" Jules asked.

"Of course, what time is it? Natalie asked. "My mom should be here about 10"

"It's coming up to 9" Jules replied as she got up and headed for the ladies bathroom.

The doctors came and went. Nurses came and went. No one said anything.

Sam's mother arrived just after 10. Patricia Braddock looked older than Jules remembered noticing the grey streaks that had appeared in her hair since they had last met. She and Jules hugged - it was an awkward hug left over from the resentment Jules believed Patricia Braddock still felt towards her for breaking her son's heart the first time around. She probably believed Jules would do it again. She would be wrong though, for that she could absolutely and categorically guarantee. It might be her turn to have a broken heart. She knew her heart would crumble if Sam died, she knew too she would never recover from it and hoped her God would not be so cruel as to do that to her.

Patricia Braddock stayed a few hours and then Natalie took her back to Sam's apartment.

Natalie returned very quickly.

"How fast did you drive?" Jules asked Natalie.

Natalie didn't answer. She was sure Jules would not wish to know how far over the speed limit she had actually driven. "My mom's coming back later this evening, and then I think she is going home. She says she can't bear to see Sam like this so Spike has offered to drive her to the station."

Jules could not understand why Sam's mother would leave, nor did she believe for one minute that his father was not contactable. _Sam you have very strange parents, _she thought.

It was late afternoon and Natalie had gone to the canteen to get them some food when a doctor approached Jules.

"Natalie Braddock?" the doctor asked

"No, I'm afraid she has gone to the canteen, my name is Jules Callaghan; I am Sam's fiancée". Ok she knew it was stretching the truth, but she was sure she would be his fiancée one day and anyway, doctors had a habit of only giving information to next of kin.

Unfortunately, he wasn't there to tell her that her Sam had woken up; that he was fine and he would be coming home in a day or two. No, he just handed her some forms which Natalie and Greg would need to deal with.

"Can I see him?" Jules asked the Doctor with the forms.

He wasn't sure; he would need to ask someone, Sam wasn't his patient. Then he was gone promising to be back with some information, he never did. So she waited, and then Natalie returned with some food so they ate and waited.

Two hours passed, when a young intern approached them. He asked if Jules and Natalie were with Officer Braddock. Jules' stomach flipped unsure if the news was going to be good or bad. It was sort of good. There had been no change, Sam had not died, he was still unconscious but they would be allowed into the room briefly.

He had made it through the night, the first milestone. Against all the odds, against what every doctor said to them about preparing themselves to say goodbye, Sam was still alive and now she could go in and touch his hand and stoke his face and tell him she loves him. As Jules entered the room her whole body started to visibly shake and she had to brace herself against the frame of Sam's bed. Exhaustion, probably, breaking heart most definitely.

Each day was a milestone; it was an extra day Sam had survived: he was still sleeping, but sleeping was good; sleeping wasn't dead. The doctors had reassured her that sleep was nature's way of healing the body. There had been a few downs, when Sam's heart started beating unusually fast and everyone got worried. It settled down and returned to a more or less normal rhythm. Or when the doctors thought Sam's kidney they had repaired had started to fail. Minor hiccups in the whole scheme of things. Sam had been shot fallen 50 or so feet onto snow covered concrete and lived; not quite out of the woods yet, he would need to wake up first.

There had been a few downs and now they were waiting for the ups. It had been four days since the surgeon had spent a marathon amount of time putting Sam back together again and there still had not been any indication that Sam would wake up, but Jules was hopeful it would happen soon.

The team had been so supportive they came everyday, stayed for a few hours, and went home. Greg had told Jules not to worry about work. She guessed the guys knew about her and Sam now, especially since she had literally moved into the hospital. She changed and showered and ate her meals there. Natalie had gone home, seen Spike, regrouped and came back with clothes for Jules but Jules had stayed. The staff had tried to make her go home; had told her it was against the rules; she didn't care. They told her she would make herself ill; she didn't care. She would stay and when Sam woke up she would be there.

The nurses gave up trying to persuade Jules to go home. Instead they gave her a recliner chair from one of the staff rooms, a pillow and a blanket.

Jules and Greg had reconciled; she hoped he had forgiven her for being so awful to him that first night. She was still determined to leave the SRU however; she had not changed her mind about that.

Visitors had been allowed into Sam's room for 10 minutes in the morning and 10 minutes in the afternoon and only two visitors at any one time. When Jules wasn't in his room talking to him and stroking his good arm or his forehead, she sat outside the ICU glass screen and mostly just watched him, watched for a sign that he was waking up.

It was the sixth day when Jules was holding his hand and relaying a story Spike had told her when his hand moved. Jules heart nearly jumped out of her chest and she started to look around the room for a buzzer or something to let someone know Sam's hand had moved. She eyed the buzzer on the other side of the bed, crap she would not be able to get to it without letting go of Sam's hand. Sam's hand moved again.

"Sam, hi baby, it's Jules, you had an accident and you are in hospital, but you are OK."

She could see Sam was coming to and he had started to panic. Jules pressed the buzzer as hard as she could until a nurse came through the door.

The ICU nurse took control and knew exactly what was happening. "OK Sam, try not to panic you have a tube down your throat, I know it's uncomfortable but it's is helping you to breath. Don't fight it Sam, just try and relax." She then told Jules to go to the nurses' station and ask them to get a doctor to Sam's room immediately.

Jules ran to the nurses' station "We need a doctor a.s.a.p. Jules said, Sam's waking up"

* * *

.

**Chapter 4 - Coming Home**

Greg, Spike and Wordy sat around the briefing table which now looked a lot bigger since Team 1's complement of SRU Officers had shrunk by half.

Greg addressed his team and said "We have a problem -Team 1 cannot function as a unit with only three officers. Ed was not due back for another month or so and Jules was on extended leave. "

"But with Sam awake now, surely Jules would be returning to the SRU." Spike said.

Greg didn't disclose that he had a resignation letter from Jules in his desk drawer which for now remained unopened. He had told her he wanted to give her time to be with Sam to help him; but the fact still remained they were down three officers and they could not operate that way.

Inspector Holleran had come up with a temporary solution. Team 2 was down an officer and he had therefore decided to provisionally combine the two teams. As Team 1 held the senior positions Greg would be The Unit's sergeant and John Sullivan his deputy. Head of tactical would be Wordy and Spike Head of Technical. Andrew Long, together with Benton would be the long range marksmen. For the time being, the team would be called Team 1 and there would be no team 2 until each team had its full complement of officers.

The new team structure would come into force on Monday which meant both Team 1 and Team 2 had three days off.

Greg informed his team regarding the progress of the Laker Street case. The subject who had taken Tracey Winters hostage and had presumably shot her sister Sonya had been identified as Otis Sanders; he was a gang member and was also believed to be involved with Jason DeShawn. The two subjects on the roof had been identified as Luke and Ben Johnson; they were indeed brothers. They had been in and out of prison since they were teenagers and were also believed to be linked to Jason DeShawn. Helen Winters who had fallen along with Sam was the younger sister of Tracey and Sonya Winters.

"Do you think the Johnson brothers deliberately pushed Sam and the woman off the roof after they shot them?" Spike asked.

"I think that was a possible scenario - maybe they thought it would create a diversion and they could get away. However, Sam could have fallen as a result of being shot. Unfortunately, it was pure speculation as Sam cannot remember anything after he went on to the roof." Greg said. And there it was again, that niggling doubt which made him think something was not right about the whole situation.

It had been sixteen days since Sam had fallen of the roof and ten days since he had woken up for the first time. The breathing tube down Sam's throat had been removed. He was still in ICU, however, but he was now well and truly on the mend. And Jules did not live at the hospital anymore.

"I hear they are moving you out of ICU tomorrow - still not home, but it's one step closer" Jules said as she kissed him on the lips.

"You think" Sam replied. Sam was impatient to get home and start the rehabilitation process so he could take the first steps to getting back on the team.

"You can't rush it, things will happen in their own time." Jules said.

Sam looked at her with raised eyebrows "Really Jules because you was so patient when you had been shot."

"I Know, I know, pot, kettle black and all that" Jules responded and added "but, Sam, I hadn't nearly died three times."

Jules wasn't exaggerating; Sam had nearly died three times. Twice from cardiac arrests and the third time - possibly the worst time because Sam had already woken up, the breathing tube had been removed and everything was looking good. She had been to the canteen and when she was walking back she saw doctors and nurses working on Sam and panic on their faces. He had contracted an infection and had to be intubated again. One of the Doctors sat Jules down and told her he felt this might be just too much for Sam's body to fight after all he had been through and she needed to prepare herself.

She wanted to tell Sam how desolate and terrified she had felt. He did not understand, could not understand, because he had been unconscious. She had to cope when the doctors told her to prepare herself because they felt he had only hours to live. He didn't have to watch his sister Natalie collapse in complete despair and watch Spike comfort her. He did not know that when the doctors told her he was dying, the only thing Jules wanted to do was to lie on his bed and sink into the abyss with him because life without him would just not be living. He did not know that on each and every time Sam's heart stopped beating so did hers.

Sam wanted nothing more than to get out of the hospital. It had started to suffocate him. He craved fresh air and the exhilaration of hot calls even if they ended with him falling off a roof. Sam missed the camaraderie of his team mates and the everyday moments that happen in between saving lives and rappelling down buildings. But even more than that Sam missed Jules. He missed waking up next to her every morning, watching her crinkle her nose when he stroked her face. He missed seeing her smile because she had not smiled since he had been in this place. He needed to get home and be with Jules and then everything would get back to normal.

"When are you going back to work Jules, you can't stay off forever?"

"I told you, the Boss has given me unlimited leave". She replied trying hard not to look Sam in the eye as he would know instantly she was lying.

"Jules"

Jules bit the inside of her mouth; she knew she had been busted. Crap she thought, he's going to kill me. "I'm not going back ….I ... I have resigned."

"You did what? Whatever for?" Sam asked not quite believing what she had just told him.

"So I could be with you and take care of you" Jules said trying to explain although it made more sense in her head than when she said it out loud.

"What are you talking about?" And then he knew.

"You think you owe me because I helped you. You really believe I would expect the same. Do you not know me at all? Let's just get one thing straight, Julianna Callaghan; I helped you to get back on the team because I love you, and you're great at what you do, not because it was a favor to be called in when I needed to. And one more thing you don't get to decide to quit your job without consulting me. We're a team Jules, we have to talk about things that affect our lives and you quitting is definitely one of them. Did you ever think how we would live Jules, because I sure as hell can't work at the moment"? Sam winced and his breathing became more rapid. Shit, maybe he wasn't as well as he thought because now he just felt exhausted and like crap.

Jules stroked his face to reassure herself he was alright. "That was why I didn't want to tell you, because I knew you would react this way and clearly you are not yet fully recovered". Jules added "But I know you are right Sam, I'm sorry".

She had been trying to make amends for choosing the team over him, but she finally understood - Sam didn't blame her, had never blamed her. Greg and Ed were right too, she had made the decision to quit the SRU out of panic and fear and it was time she fixed things.

'I guess I need to go and see the Boss about going back to work". Jules said.

"I think you should go now" Sam said and then added "It's kinda sweet that you were willing to give up the SRU for me"

"Yeah well you just better work your ass off to get back on the team; can't be down a guy for too long" Jules said as she left his room.

Normality returned to the SRU within a relatively short space of time. Ed returned to work early because his doctors felt his recovery was complete. It had been agreed by Holleran that a temporary replacement for Sam would be found. This proved to be far easier than first thought. When Brian Coulson returned to Team 2, it was decided that Andrew Long would be temporarily seconded to Team 1 so both Team 1 and 2 had a complement of six officers.

And Sam: Sam finally left St. Simons 41 days after he was rushed there with only a slim chance of survival. Jules and the team had picked him up with balloons and streamers. It was totally embarrassing and he loved every minute of it. As Jules drove him to her house he looked out of the window; he felt good - he had fought to survive and won; but now he had one more fight on his hands, the fight to get back on the team.

Jules turned to see Sam lost in thought.

"Are you OK Sam?"

"Yeah, just miles away" He looked at the woman he was so lucky to have. She was beautiful, brave and strong and he loved every single thing about her. "What's for dinner; I'm starving?"

"Anything you like, what do you fancy?" Jules said.

"You" Sam said smiling. "It's been a long time".

"Unfortunately, Sam Braddock, I am off the menu for the time being, you heard the doctors no stress, no exertion …"

"No fun", Sam interjected

"No sex" Jules said "It's just as hard for me Sam, I have needs too" She laughed.

Jules pulled up outside her house. Sam felt good to finally be home. He had always felt more at home at Jules' house than his own apartment especially since Natalie had moved in. He and Jules had spoken about the living arrangements when he was still in the hospital and it had been decided Sam would live with Jules until he was fully recovered. But they both knew this was going to be a permanent arrangement, one they both wanted.

It had worked out for the best as Spike had moved into Sam's apartment with Natalie so Sam did not have to worry about the rent and bills.

They sat down on her sofa and Sam took it all in. He had been afraid he would never see Jules or this place again and suddenly the past 41 days hit him like a brick wall and he broke down. Jules held Sam and she sobbed with him until exhaustion let them sleep still locked in their embrace together on the sofa.

Jules woke first, it was dark outside and Sam was still sleeping. She carefully tried to extricate herself from his embrace so as not to wake him. She walked into the kitchen and put on the light. The wall clock told her it was 9.25 p.m. They had been sleeping for five hours. Jules filled the kettle and placed it on the flame and took a carton of eggs out of the fridge and in doing so noticed Sam standing in the doorway.

"I'm making eggs is that OK?" Jules asked.

"Your eggs are better than any I have ever tasted, so yeah that's OK" Sam replied and then continued "I'm sorry about earlier, I kind of lost it"

"We both did Sam. Something horrible happened to you and it's going to take a while for us both to get over but we'll be OK because we have each other and that's all that matters" Jules said kissing him gently. They held each other no words needed: They were home and there was nowhere in the world they would rather be.

The whistling from the kettle broke the silence.

They sat in the kitchen eating eggs and drinking tea - coffee was not allowed in Sam's diet for the time being. They were the best eggs he had ever tasted and the tea, well, he could get used to tea.

Sam's first night out of hospital was over. Tomorrow Jules would head off to work and he would get her recipe books down from the cupboard and surprise her with dinner - hopefully. He had two weeks until physiotherapy starts - two weeks to rest and two weeks to practice cooking.

"Tell me that was not Sam again" Jules said to Winnie exasperatingly.

Winnie smiled. Sam had already called four times that day and it was only 2 pm.

"Sam's driving me mad, he's driving Winnie mad. He's constantly checking to see if I back from a call, gone on a call, still on a call" Jules said explaining to Greg and Ed why she looked so frustrated.

Both Ed and Greg were laughing at Jules. "He's bored Jules, and he loves you so he's worried" Ed tried to explain. "It won't be so bad when he starts physio. It will keep his mind off you, and off work." Greg added.

"And until then he will continue to drive me and Winnie nuts" Jules said as she headed to the locker room. She was hot, she needed a shower and to change into a clean uniform. The last call had been particularly stressful and she daren't tell Sam that the jumper on the bridge had nearly taken her with him when he decided his life was no longer worth living. She had held onto him and now he was undergoing a psych evaluation and she was heading to the showers before debriefing.

In the evening when Jules returned home and told Sam about her day, she downplayed every incident: Every call was a simple one, and no-one died. Sam knew exactly what she was doing. He didn't like feeling panicked every time she left the house: He tried not calling Winnie but he could not stop himself from checking constantly that Jules, his Jules was OK and that she would be returning to him again.

Jules did understand, because she panicked every time Sam looked tired. Worried that he had picked up another infection; worried he would never be well enough to make it back on the team. She just hid her emotions better than him.

"Sam, this is delicious" Jules said tucking into a plate of food that had been waiting for her as soon as she was out of the shower after a particularly long shift. "You cooked this, seriously - I am not going to find any take-out boxes in the trash?"

"Could you not sound _**so**_ surprised - I told you I have been practicing" Sam laughed and added "It's by way of a mini celebration".

"What are we celebrating?" Jules asked.

"I start physiotherapy tomorrow and I'm feeling really well, Jules…..really well".

Jules knew the look on Sam's face and to what he was referring and laughed.

"Only you, Sam Braddock would celebrate the fact that we are going to have sex"

"We are?"

"Oh Yes, Sam, we most definitely are"

"Cool, I'll get dessert".

"You made dessert too?"

"Of course," he said taking a tub of Ben and Jerry's ice cream out of the freezer, two spoons out of the drawer and headed upstairs.

"I'll wait for you upstairs - leave the dishes" Sam said with a gorgeous grin.

"Copy" Jules replied as she headed straight after him.

* * *

**Chapter 5 - New Beginnings**

It had been 18 weeks since Sam had come so close to dying. It had happened in January when Sam had fallen off a three story building onto thick snow. It was now May - spring had arrived and the sun was warm and comforting. There was a constant aroma of newly cut grass and lavender. There was also a feeling of rebirth and new beginnings and it had been extended into the Callaghan/Braddock household.

A new beginning for Sam: He had passed both the physical and psychological tests; had been cleared for active duty and could rejoin Team 1 effective immediately.

Jules knew she had worked hard to get her spot back on the team, but it paled into comparison to how hard Sam had worked.

It had been tough, tougher than he had ever thought possible. Sam would come home from physiotherapy so exhausted it would take all his strength just to climb the stairs and shower. He would lean against the cool white tiles while the scalding water danced on his shattered body. Tears would fall and the noise of the shower stifling the sobs from his throat. They were tears of pain and tears of utter frustration.

Sam felt his body had let him down. He had the scars as a constant reminder of the pain but found it hard to cope with the sheer weakness he felt. He could not remember a time when he had felt so useless.

He had never told Jules but she knew. The sparkle had gone from those amazing blue eyes of his. She had been worried that his determination had been waning too.

Sam kept going through the frustration and the pain; he kept going never missing a physiotherapy appointment and training harder than he had ever done in his life.

It had paid off; in just under five months he was to rejoin Team 1. No one had ever re-qualified that quickly following a serious injury. Heck no one with Sam's injuries would probably be alive let alone back on the Strategic Response Team. Even Ed had been impressed with how quickly Sam had made it back on the team. The sparkle in those gorgeous blue eyes had returned.

Sam had always had a super fit body, but now it blew Jules away. His abdominal muscles so clearly and cleanly defined. The scars the only reminder of what Sam's body had been through.

"I never thought it would be possible, but you look stronger and fitter than before your injury and that six pack, wow" Jules said lying in bed admiring Sam's body as he walked to the shower.

"I feel great and it pleases me that my gorgeous girlfriend thinks I look good".

"You could always show me how I please you" Jules said suggestively, tapping the bed with her hand.

Sam forgot immediately about showering and headed straight over to Jules.

"Sam you have no idea how good you look and how sexy you are" Jules said kissing him passionately.

They held each other for a long time neither wanting to be the first to break the embrace. It was comfortable and easy and their relationship had grown because of what happened. When a second chance was given it had to be taken with both hands and held onto no matter what. Jules knew she was unbelievably lucky she had two second chances with Sam and she was not letting go, not this time.

As her head rested on his chest Jules listened to his heartbeat, slow and steady, and imagined what would have happened if Sam had died that day, what her life would have been like without him. The very thought of it made her body physically shudder.

"Are you OK Jules?

"Yes, I'm fine, just thinking we ought to get up, you don't want to be late on your first day back".

"Suppose you're right" Sam said. He was looking forward to rejoining the team, but he seriously could have stayed wrapped in her body forever.

Today he felt good, today he could walk into the SRU as a Team 1 member. There had been times he did not think it would have been possible. He felt good too that he and Jules could be open about their relationship in front of the team. He wasn't worried about anyone else - he would keep the secret from the rest of the world if need be. Sam today had everything he had ever wanted and he was blissfully happy.

The day went well, everyone was glad to see Sam back. Ed spoke to him and told him returning to work was completely different to re-qualification. He would probably feel tired the first few days and he should come and tell him if that happened. Ed knew what he was talking about he had only recently returned to the SRU himself and was speaking from experience. "I felt exhausted my first week back Sam, so take it easy, well as easy as this job allows. It is good to have you back just watch yourself, no leaping of tall buildings, leave that for Superman." Ed was glad Sam was back, he was an excellent SRU Officer but much more than that he was family, their family and when one was hurt; they all hurt.

It was a slow day no hot calls and the day was spent bringing Sam up to speed on what had been happening in the SRU while he was away.

The week went by in much the same way, there were some hot calls, but no one had died or had to be stopped from killing. Jules negotiated on two of the calls and was brilliant and Greg knew it. His protégé was finally coming into her own. She could lead her own team he didn't doubt, but he knew she loved Team 1 and would never willingly transfer to another team even if it meant a promotion to the rank of Sergeant.

Greg paid close attention to Jules and Sam out in the field. Watched for the tiniest sign they were involved, that they would endanger lives because of their love for each other. He saw no sign, no hint they were together. He knew he was taking a risk; knew there would be serious consequences for everyone if Toth found out, but for him and the rest of the team it was a risk worth taking.

Ed agreed. Ed had been skeptical at first. Not believing two people in love could possibly not hinder the dynamics of the team but he had been proved wrong. He had never met two people who could be so focused and professional at work and so different when the uniform came off. He and Sophie had been to theirs for dinner and they were so in tune with each other, so loving.

Friday had finally come, it had been a long week and Sam knew what Ed was talking about because Jesus he felt tired. It had not been a real tough week either. No serious incidents or life threatening moments. Much of the week they had spent patrolling or running drills. The others wanted to go to the Goose as a proper 'welcome back Sam drink', but he just wanted to go home and sleep. He didn't want to disappoint the guys so he headed off to the locker room for a much needed shower which would also wake him up. He'd just go for a while, show his face and then head off home.

The Goose was busy, everybody there for the same end-of-the-week wind down drink. Sam offered to get the first round, that way when he left early he would have already paid his share.

Jules managed to find a table, so at least they could sit. Once the others were sitting Jules went off to help Sam with the drinks.

Sam and Jules stayed the requisite amount of time. Everyone was having a good time and he would have stayed much longer had he not felt so utterly exhausted. He told Jules she could stay but she insisted on driving him home. They left their teammates laughing at one of Spikes funny stories and telling everyone that they would see them all on Monday.

Sam loved coming home, Jules's house; or rather their house now, had warmth about it that just drew you in. He didn't feel as tired either, as he walked through the door his spirits seemed to lift.

"I will cook tonight, you are really tired" Jules said

"It's funny; I don't feel that tired anymore, I'll cook". Sam said. He had discovered that not only did he like to cook he was actually very good at it. He told her to shower and dinner would be ready when she came down.

Jules was pleased. Sam had become quite the chef while he had been off work recuperating and he could do things with pasta that made her mouth water.

"Can we have Ben and Jerry's for dessert? Jules asked.

"Of course", Sam laughed knowing exactly what Jules was referring to.

The weekend was relaxing and enjoyable. The weather was hotter than average for the time of year; Spike and Natalie had come over on Sunday afternoon for an impromptu BBQ and before long the whole team with partners and kids were in Jules and Sam's garden. It was one of those really special days that enveloped everybody in its warmth.

"That was a good day" Sam said climbing into bed next to Jules.

"Wasn't it - and how cute is Izzy?" Jules said.

"Want to make an Izzy one day Jules?" Sam asked

"I do Sam, one day, how about you?" Jules was sure Sam wanted to start a family and she was hoping he was on the same page as her regarding the timing. She would not want to be pressured into having a baby - it was a big decision, and there was also the matter of her career.

"I would love to make an Izzy with you, but when you're ready. And when you are ready, I will be too". Sam said kissing her gently on the lips and then added "I quite like practicing though".

"How did I get so damn lucky, Braddock?" Jules said pulling Sam closer to her "I like practicing too".

Jules and Sam's lives fell into a comfortable pattern, and it was as easy as breathing. Their lives were complete; they had the team and each other and life was good, life was very very good.

For now Sam and Jules slept; happy and content and blissfully unaware of the nightmare which was about to engulf them.

**To be continued.**


End file.
